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As the “story” of Trayvon Martin spreads, I doubt we can/will ever know the Truth. And who believes a solution will be found that will satisfy ALL interested parties? But that doesn’t stop people from reposting, re-tweeting and otherwise spreading information, whether it’s true or not.

I’m very concerned because it’s mostly NOT about keeping the story alive; and now, I keep seeing talk of an impending race war/race riots. Conditions are ripe: longstanding buried racial tension, economic frustration, rampant political partisanship and lack of civil discourse coupled with inflammatory reporting by the media. And don’t think it can’t happen because there are plenty of unstable people who would love nothing more than for the country to be (further) destabilized by interracial violence.

The main problem with this (besides the obvious) is just like a drive-by shooting, it’s rarely the fringe types who are affected when something happens. And what if you did get word of a race war, what would you do? Who could you trust? Where would you turn for day-to-day updates?  As my mother is fond of saying as a proof: “It was on the news AND the internet.” While the part about the news may have meant something many, many years ago; you also can’t totally rely on the Internet.  We never see the retractions, corrections or apologies for disseminating information that could easily have been fact checked – and the damage is done.

I’m reminded of the old War of the Worlds scenario where a panic was caused based on a radio drama–because the people were already living in a heightened state of anxiety. WE are there. And with technology the way it is, isn’t this so much more likely today?

I guess we’re just going to have to trust each other, in the inherent good in the majority of people and stop giving into the worst/basest instincts in each of us. If you agree, PLEASE spread THIS message and don’t be afraid to call out the crap when and where you see it – even/especially from a person that looks like YOU.

It’s the fact that even in a 3-piece suit, you can’t hail a cab;

That you’ve shopped and been followed as a risk;

That you can’t congregate without raising suspicion.

And the fact that you have to defend against being thought/called a racist;

That there’s never an opportunity to “talk” about race relations;

That it’s easier and possible to pretend like everything is equal.

I wonder if we will use this latest “incident” (Trayvon Martin) to talk about what really ails us as a nation. So far it’s not looking that way. Everyone is lining up in their usual corner: name calling, casting aspersions, leveraging for monetary/political gain, etc. What happened to the “teachable moment” talk?

I don’t need you, these figureheads or talking heads to tell me we have a serious problem and that the way Trayvon Martins are seen is a symptom of that much bigger problem. Or that the ONLY reason we are taking about Trayvon Martin is because the perpetrator is NOT Black. Because to the media, Trayvon Martin is just a story with a perfect lead in (racial strife); one that will likely fade from the public imagination as soon as something “better” comes along. But to me, Trayvon Martin is more than a story with an expected outcome. He was a person who suffered the lethal consequences of our inability to talk about race relations, inequality, stereotypes, media bias, historical implications and easily anticipated consequences.

Are we even capable of TALKING to each other anymore? Or better yet, are we capable of hearing each other? We can lock up the accused but we still have to have this out – preferably in conversation – hopefully sooner than later.

Many of you weren’t born or don’t remember when Roots: the Saga of an American Family first aired in January, 1977. It was a groundbreaking eight night mini-series about—SLAVERY (hey, that’s racist). In hindsight, it seems like a miracle that a docudrama (not comedy) about slavery appeared on network television. Not only did it air it was widely watched. According to Nielsen ratings, the finale was the 3^rd most watched telecast of all time in the U.S. That shows there was major interest but even back then, I don’t remember talking about it in school.

Nevertheless, those were different times; the olden days. Now, with our Black President, we’re colorblind and things are equal.  No need to dredge up the past, to reflect on our history in an attempt to understand how we’ve become who and what we are as a nation. Right?

It’s great that Oprah is airing a reunion show (click link) on Martin Luther King Jr. Day but Roots the series is ALWAYS available on DVD. It’s another part of “American” history, otherwise suitable for viewing outside of Black History Month. Who knows, you might learn something.

WARNING: The question you are about to read is REAL, has in no way been edited to make a particular point and only shows that people DO ask these questions. However, my answer most definitely reflects my personal experience and bias.  Welcome to my life.

S (a woman) wrote:
Why is it alright to have a Ms. Black America? I consistently feel offended and  outraged when Ms. Black America comes on television. Also, the American Negro College Fund infuriates me. Should I open a foundation and openly ask the public for funds for a scholarship solely for white folks, Jesse Jackson and the  press would be occupying my yard by the next morning. Why is this OK???

YBF:
I’m sorry for the delay in responding . And although this practice annoys me, I’ll answer your question with some questions of my own.

Can you tell me why you are offended, outraged and infuriated by these things?? Those are very strong descriptors for your feelings. Are you personally affected by Ms. Black America? Does she somehow detract from the profile of Ms. America or your idea of beauty? WAIT, it *appears* the current Ms. America IS Black, at least she won Miss Black California in 2003. Personally, I don’t pay enough attention to these contests to have previously known  so — thanks.

Do you believe a foundation soliciting public funds for educating white folks is needed? If so, you’d be well within your rights to create such a scholarship fund (by the way, they already exist). If Jesse Jackson showed up in your yard, wouldn’t that draw attention to your cause? Sounds like a good thing to me. Then again, if drawing attention to your worthy cause is your objective, he’s no longer the best person 

I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to write and I eagerly await your response.

Seems like everyone is required to take a stance on gay marriage these days so, for whatever it’s worth, here is YourBlackFriend’s two cents.

If “The gays” (my nod to Donald Trump) want the right to be married then, as has frequently been quipped, they deserve the right to be as miserable as the rest of us.  Arguments about the sanctity of family have long been buried in the moral graveyard of the traditional heterosexual family unit. And why foolishly get caught up in the matter of choice i.e., whether or not a person chooses to be gay. This is mostly an indefensible position/untenable argument. Personally, I can’t see why one would willingly choose the drama that goes along with coming out and being gay in this society; but again, that’s a different conversation. Homosexual marriage does not take food from my mouth, money from my pockets or love from my heart so – have at it.

Having said that, I do not co-sign the decision, in some gay activist circles, to compare(?) the struggle for gay rights with the struggle for Black Civil Rights. I hope a legitimate case can be made without having to co-opt the Movement because the fallacy of the logic detracts from their argument.  Quite simply, I will NEVER have the option to hide/obscure the fact that I’m Black. You, on the other hand can closet/choose to not highlight your sexual orientation and continue to reap the benefits you currently enjoy.  While it’s a shame that you feel like you have to deny your-self, the fact remains that you have (and can exercise) the option.  Being Black and being gay is NOT equal.

Recently, comedienne Wanda Sykes made a (silly) statement to the effect that one group (gay or Black) has the harder road to travel in society. As a Black gay woman, I think she got overly caught up in her sexual politics. Perhaps what she meant was:  is there anything more difficult than being Black and gay? As any honest gay Black person will tell you, racism is rampant within the LGBT community and this brings my point full circle. When it comes down to it, what makes The gays truly any different than the rest of us? Let them eat (wedding) cake!!